How to be a good pedestrian

IMG_0929

Who needs crosswalks?

Look for cars –¬†Don’t assume we see you, if you are coming from a blind spot (say behind a bush or multi-passenger van) then you need to make sure a car is not already in the crosswalk. Don’t sprint out there in front of us.

Use the crosswalk – It’s there for your safety, it’s a clear path for you to make it safely to the other side while I’m trying to finish this blog post on WordPress mobile.

Walk in a straight line –Don’t walk diagonally from the lot to the door, again use the crosswalk it’s a great guideline.

Don’t dilly dally – I have frozen chicken in the trunk and we would prefer it was roasting on the grill and not near my spare tire.

Don’t text – your Facebook update or text message can wait until you are safely on the sidewalk.

Don’t stop – now is not the time to impress your girlfriend by showing that you have the right away and shout and throw your cigarette at my car.

Remember just because the law says you have the right of way doesn’t mean that you can walk like a zombie into oncoming traffic.

 

No more booster seat?

white shuttle spaceship takes on

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

When do you let your kids out of a booster seat? Whenever I want to, that’s when. I understand safety guidelines, but how is a booster seat going to help at the rate of speed that I drive? Or as a matter of fact, someone else is driving? A crash at that speed the child might as well be sitting on a stack of glued together phone books.

I remember laying in the front seat of my Dad’s Dodge Dart when we had a wreck and I believe I hit the windshield. But that part is fuzzy. I turned out fine. I recall taking a nap in the front seat of my Dad’s Dodge Dart when my father had a wreck and I believe I hit the windshield. But that part is unclear. I turned out just fine.

In my opinion, if a child can put their feet on the floor with their back to the seat and the seatbelt doesn’t choke them, then they are ready to toss the booster seat. Not out the window because I do not believe in littering.

*Disclaimer, don’t break the law, check your local guidelines and follow them. Or at least, don’t get caught or wreck. Oh who cares you are going to do what you want anyway.

Standing in common walkways.

img_4444

Whenever you are attending a sporting event where many people are moving from place to place, stand in the common walkways. Take up as much space as possible. Walk side by side instead of single file. Don’t forget to stop and reverse directions. You might want to make sweeping hand and arm gestures so that you accidentally hit someone as they are walking by.¬†Remember, you are the only important person there.

Hating on Winnie the Pooh.

Old pooh

I’ve had this one almost as long as I’ve been alive. I got him for my first birthday. He still hasn’t disintegrated thus far. Not sure how anyone can ban Pooh from anything. He’s such a nice bear we overlook the gorging on the honey. I mean, he even has a ride at Walt Disney’s Magic Kingdom. There isn’t any higher honor than that.

Do you share music with your children?

skc cassette tape on white surface

Photo by Stas Knop on Pexels.com

I’ll never forget the look of shock on my Dad’s face when he was taking me to school and asked to listen to one of my cassette tapes. I don’t know if he asked or I just put the tape in. Anyway, I played a few short snippets of the latest 2 Live Crew release. It wasn’t long before the tape was ejected and then very few words were spoken on the remainder of the journey to school. The cloud of disappointment was precipitous.

I’ve pretty much abandoned all Hip-Hop after 1997 because I really started listening to the lyrics and how terrible the content was. Turns out, I really only liked the beats and scratching. I’ve since started a small project where I will find the instrumentals splice together the hooks and scratches so I don’t have to hear all the vulgarities.

Now that I’m an adult, I’ve become concerned with what my children listen to. They don’t listen to much other than Disney soundtracks or whatever I listen to when I take them places. Don’t worry, NWA and 2 Live Crew don’t make it into the rotation anymore. The closest I get to listening to Luke Skywalker is the Star Wars scores.

 

 

When can kids ride in the front seat?

When do you let your kids ride in the front seat? Well, hopefully never. Maybe when they are old enough to drive. Once they make that move from the back to front they will try to control the A/C and SiriusXM settings. We have a 100-pound rule, once they reach that weight threshold, they can sit in the front seat. We figure by then they will be tall enough as well. So we have to control their diet so we don’t end up with a 100-pound 3-foot weeble wobble in the front seat. There are some stipulations.

Guide to rubbernecking an accident

https://giphy.com/embed/Yl5aO3gdVfsQ0

via GIPHY

 

There are two types of people when passing an accident on the roadways.

  1. The person who says, “We should all pray for them so that everyone is safe”
  2. The person who says, “If they survive, they should be taken to jail after they’ve been treated for their injuries. They’ve ruined my day and my plans.”

Seriously, if you are in traffic and you are approaching an accident, just GO! It’s none of your business what is going with that scene. Certainly, don’t slow down and try to look. If you do witness some gore, it will haunt you forever. Keep moving…