If Disney Ran the United States

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Mr. Walt and his running mate for 2024

Can you imagineer the possibilities if Disney ran the country? There would be pros and cons of course. I guess it really depends on if you are a fan of Disney.

Healthcare

Healthcare costs would skyrocket, but you could at least reserve a fast pass for the emergency room. How awesome would it be to immediately hop on a paper-covered table to be examined while others have been waiting for 90 minutes for a 3-minute diagnosis? All your medicine would cost four times as much. However,  you can pay a premium if you want to guzzle your Robitussin from a souvenir cup.

Immigration

It would be too expensive to enter the United States and you would have so many people complaining “I wish I could afford to go to the United States”. Maybe there would be blackout dates where you couldn’t stay in the country. The truth is, every Main street USA would be packed to capacity, but at least it would smell good with Disney bakery exhaust.

Taxes

There would be no taxes whatsoever because there would be limited choices of high-quality items that are out of everyone’s price range.

Disney National Parks Service

Since the entire country would essentially be Disney Country, Walt Disney World and Disneyland would essentially just be like any other national park. All the other National Parks would get an upgrade as well. Can you imagine a giant slide into the Grand Canyon or the Haunted Mammoth Cave?

Transportation and Infrastructure

If you’ve ridden Spaceship Earth at Epcot, you would see this future vision of automation fast-tracked. Peoplemovers would drop you off at work after you’ve been dressed by a Carousel of Progress robot. We would have automobile safety on par with Tomorrowland Speedway because all our cars would be on rails so we couldn’t knock each other into the ditch. However, all of America’s roadways would be exactly like Orlando traffic to encourage you to take those Peoplemovers.

Enough with the Daylight Savings

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St. Simon Island Sunrise

I once read a letter to the editor of a newspaper in which the person was complaining about springing forward. It was causing too much sunlight thus destroying their garden and lawn. I agree with this person. I think it’s time to stop springing forward. Let’s keep falling back though. Each fall we should continue to set our clocks back. How cool would it be to have our days and nights mixed up for a few years like newborn babies? To be honest, let’s start a petition at the White House to stop springing forward and back and just leave the clock in the spring forward position. Let’s let God handle the daylight.

Favorite Driving Microaggressions

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Photo by Matheus Bertelli on Pexels.com
  • Using your blinker just as someone enters your blind spot, so they have the impression that you will run them off the road
  • Excessively using your wiper fluid so that it sprays on the car behind you.
  • Staying in the blind spot waiting for someone to enter your lane as you are inches from their rear bumper
  • Hanging your cigarette hand out of the car window
  • Not repairing dents and dings so others know you don’t care what happens to your car
  • Easing two wheels on the line as to look around the car in front of you so that you can see what the holdup is.
  • Driving in the middle lane, and riding close to the line when a car passes as if there are magnets in your side panels