New Years Eve Traditions

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In comparison to Halloween, New Years is my next least favorite holiday. New Years Eve television is more painful to watch than the Superbowl halftime show. Every year the debauchery and hedonism is cranked up another notch as the desensitizing of our culture continues down the slippery slope of depravity.

We make a bunch of snacks as the last hurrah for the diet that starts the next day. Or maybe we move the new diet to January 2nd, you know, leftovers. We stay up late to watch people grind each other on television while we listen to the horrific noises that pass for music that’s shoved in our ear canals for the hour leading up to the ball drop. Ball drops, people kiss, sing the same song every year, then go to bed.

New Years is just another day, there is nothing magical about January 1st. Don’t make promises to yourself that you can’t keep. If you want to change, change now or six months from now. Just make up your mind that you want to do it.

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Running on Christmas Cheer Fumes

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Every year we get super excited for Christmas and by the time December 25th rolls around we are ready for it to be over. This year I started way too early, we visited Disney Theme Parks the week before Thanksgiving and all the decorations were up and the holiday music was blasting. We had our Christmas tree up before Thanksgiving. I jumped the gun this year on the Holiday Cheer and ended up running on fumes.

Next year we will wait until Black Friday to start decorating. That way we don’t get burned out like a Yankee candle left on the mantle all night. We are already removing Christmas items from the house and putting them back in storage. We usually wait until January 2nd. I think it makes Christmas much more gloomy.

Happy Boxing Day

8e656350c58a2c04676943cae2c698b1I never understood what boxing day was until I made some friends from the Great White North. I thought it was a day where we remembered the greats like Cassius Clay or Mike Tyson punching people in the face. It’s either that or a day when we box up all of our gifts that we didn’t like and take them back to the stores in which they came.

Probably the most ungrateful I’ve ever been for a gift is when I was a child. I received a bean bag chair from my grandmother for Christmas. I loudly exclaimed in tears, “You don’t get furniture for Christmas”.  My childish mind thought that only toys were permitted. I remember her running up to the closest gas station that was open and buying me a green “suckerman”. At least I had a toy, my temper tantrum worked!

Christmas Day Checklist

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  • Wake up way too early because the kids didn’t sleep at all
  • Open presents, either from Santa or hard-working parents who paid for them
  • Eat breakfast – We make a sausage egg and cheese casserole.
  • Jump in the car, take off (drive about 2 hours with no traffic)
  • Arrive at first stop
  • Open presents
  • Eat lunch
  • Jump in the car, take off (30-minute drive)
  • Arrive at second stop
  • Open presents
  • Eat dinner
  • Collapse in exhaustion
  • Wonder how the kids are still going strong.

This is the short list, it used to be much longer and cover a much longer distance. Between the food, fun, family, and yes sometimes fighting, don’t forget about Jesus during this time. It’s the whole point of it all.

Happy Winter Solstice

Facebook Winter Wishes

If you still worship Saturn then I hope you have a happy winter solstice. There are many people complaining that Christmas hijacked Saturnalia. Well, they are partially right. Christmas used to be celebrated in the springtime but many were feeling left out by not participating in the drunken debauchery fest known as Saturnalia.

The church decided to move Christmas to December as a rival celebration. This would give Christians something else to do rather than eating and drinking until they vomited and other such merrymaking.  Just to be clear, Christmas is not pagan in origin but some winter celebrations are full-blown pagan. If anything paganism has crept back into Christmas.

Most Oversung Christmas Songs

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Which song do you get tired of first? Is it Jingle Bells, Frosty the Snowman, Winter Wonderland, Rudy the Red Nosed Reindeer? Technically, these aren’t really Christmas songs. They are more of winter songs which don’t have any tethering to Christ. Watch any Christmas movie and you will probably hear 700 different versions of Jingle Bells and by the end of the week after Thanksgiving, you are ready to quit Christmas music.

I used to prefer the Christmas “hymns”, songs about the savior which is the whole reason for the season. However, there are very few new songs and they contain terrible theology or Americanized to the point they shouldn’t even be canonized into Christmas. I stick to Christmas instrumentals now so I don’t have to hear some new artist destroy a classic by over singing.

Hottest Christmas Gifts of 2018: The GrandPad

This is hands down the most condescending ad of the year and worst gift idea at the same time. Maybe they want to be isolated from technology. Your older family members prefer you come to visit them in person rather than seeing your digitized face on a screen. You can’t hug a tablet and get your oxytocin.

They don’t want to see you on a vacation they weren’t invited to. They don’t want to watch you bake cookies, they want to be in the same room with you. I know some families live far apart, but what kind of person lives far away from a family member who can’t operate an iPad.  If it’s so easy, then why does it have a support feature? Let me get this straight, you buy your family member a GrandPad that’s simple to use, but you won’t even help them if something goes wrong?

Another thing, if you are going to share big news about your upcoming pregnancy over facetime video then I hope your elder family member can handle the emotional surge and doesn’t have a medical emergency right in front of you. Maybe that support button will come in handy if it ties to LifeAlert.