When I was first married, I thought it would be nice to slowly introduce the spouse to some food I enjoyed while living in the Deep South. One night I prepared Red Beans and Rice with cornbread. I went all out and bought two boxes of Tony Chachere’s from the local Food Lion. Well after a few bites in she decided it was too spicy, and plus I forgot about her terrible acid reflux.
So what now? I had a huge pot of red beans and rice that I didn’t want all that Cajun goodness to go to waste. Well, I suffered through and consumed red beans and rice for every meal for the next few days until it was gone. Let me tell you, rehydrated red beans are probably the gassiest. At first, I thought all the farting was hilarious! But after a full day of constant farts every 5 to 10 minutes and gut-wrenching gas that felt like someone was using an air compressor to inflate my large intestine, my pucker muscle was fatigued. I just wanted it to stop and so did my wife.
I was starting to leave permanent odors on my office chair from trying to hold them in. I didn’t want to kill any office plants or cause workman’s comp cases for my co-workers. Some lessons you learn the hard way.