Month: July 2025

Mastering Lane Etiquette: Your Road Survival Guide

~ SA Otey

Far left lane

AKA: the pace car. Your job is to keep everyone going the speed limit. If they pass you on the right they are then breaking the law. But so are you by continually using the far left lane. Buy hey someone else will be using it if you don’t, so why shouldn’t it be you. You are trying to keep everyone safe by obeying the posted speed limit.

Middle lane(s)

This one is a bit tricky. You have to work well with others. If you can find an 18-wheeler then you are golden. Just keep pace with them and you can now block two lanes of traffic. Bonus points if they are in the far left lane.

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Far right lane

Your job here is to block people from merging in and off the interstate. You don’t want people in front or behind you. Your goal is to run them into the grass or wrap them around a tree.  It’s also your duty to ruin people’s cruise control pace. Try to maintain a 5 to 10 MPH under the speed limit.

HOV Lane

If your city has an HOV lane then you must use it no matter what. If you don’t want to carpool and don’t have any friends or family. By now, your driving habits should secure that status for you. You will need to construct some sort of mannequin and make it your passenger. You could just follow the rules of using the Far left lane and play dumb when you get pulled over and cause everyone to be an hour late for work.

Make your own lane

Finally, if all else fails, make your own lane. This can be driving on the lines if you have a motorcycle. You can also drive on the shoulder or medians to pass people if you are in a hurry. Above all else remember, you are the most important person on the road, so act like it!

Exploring Utility Neutrality: From Water to Internet

~ SA Otey

Do you remember Net Neutrality, do you miss it? Do you even notice when you had it? To me, it sounds like people are trying to say that people have a “right” to a fast internet connection. The next step is that everyone gets free gigabit broadband. The Internet is not a public utility, you still have to pay for it, just as you do water, electricity, feces removal, and rubbish pickup. If you want a better service I think if you should have to pay for it. Why would your ISP want to slow down Netflix, Hulu, and Amazon streaming? Not everyone has a right to transportation. You can ride your skateboard, bike, bus, train, personal vehicle, luxury car, commercial jet, or private charter plane. Which one would you rather take? In my opinion, it sounds like people are being paranoid because they don’t want to give up their favorite “free speech” websites. Take that however you want to. Since we are on the subject of “public utilities”. What about…

2195-Switchboard-Operator

Water Neutrality

I will gladly pay more for premium filtered water coming into my house rather than the water that smells like it was just boiling a dozen duck eggs dipped in the sewage treatment plant. However, do I think that if I used my allotted water my water company will cut me off and let me die of thirst, no? But I pay more per month if I use more water, and I pay a minimum no water what. If I don’t pay my bill, then I get no more water.

Electricity Neutrality

I’d love a service where I didn’t get any brownouts. Companies are really cashing in on putting solar panels on your roof. What about energy neutrality, shouldn’t it all be free since the sun is free?

Website Neutrality

I already pay more for my internet because I want faster speeds, I don’t want buffering of my YouTube and Netflix so I have a business account. This way I don’t have to share bandwidth with all my neighbors who are playing video games. Truth is, I’ve already paid premium rates for Hulu with no commercials. Guess what, there were still commercials.

Trash collection Neutrality

I’ll pay more for a service where I can fill up as many containers as I want rather than just the one small one. And without bags, and I’ll pay someone to sort my plastic, glass, and cardboard. I stopped recycling because it became too much of a chore to separate all the crap myself. I don’t care about the environment anymore. Our society hates children anyway, so why should we care about their future?

Conclusion

Universities already have Internet 2 How is that fair with net neutrality? There is also this thing called the “Dark Web”, and I really have no interest in it. That thinking will still exist regardless. However, I would be interested in something called the “Light Web”. An internet that doesn’t have all the depravity, perversions, and other garbage so I don’t have to put a million filters on my internet router so I can keep my children sheltered as long as possible. Right now I guess the “Grey Web” will have to do.

The Dangers of Overusing ‘Sir’ and ‘Ma’am’ in Business

~ SA Otey
apple business fruit local

Sir  Is used as a polite or respectful way of addressing a man, especially one in a position of authority

Ma’am Is a term of respectful or polite address used for a woman.

However, whenever I hear this directed towards another human at retail, a restaurant, or another place of business during a customer complaint, it always has the connotation of @$$h0le or B! tch. It’s never used with endearment but rather as a derogatory term. It’s overused with emphasis that you are not getting what you want no matter how reasonable you are being. To be blunt, it’s a power trip for the person using it. It’s like calling your dog a stupid idiot but using a friendly voice, he still wags his tail and licks his chops with excitement.

Do you share food with your dog?

~ SA Otey

I’m not talking about a table scrap thrown to the floor for them to enjoy and get diarrhea later. I’m speaking of something I’m seeing more often in public. People give dogs their ice cream cones and share a table at a restaurant. Yes, there are dining establishments that now have portions of their menu dedicated to dogs. Drive-thru banks have dog treats in addition to lollipops for your children.

What I saw today disturbed me. A grown man with a shaved ice treats sitting on a bench at an outlet mall sharing it with a standard poodle. One cup and two spoons. There is a myth that a dog’s mouth is clean. But in reality, it’s only clean for them, since their saliva may or may not contain antiseptic and antibacterial properties. They can still reach their testicles and butt hole and they may have just finished off a serving of gnat butter before you dipped their spoon into your dessert.

Just put your headphones on, Man

~ SA Otey

There is another type of airline passenger that is even more annoying than the “first classer”. It’s the passenger next to you who doesn’t listen. If you pick an aisle seat you end up being their personal ambassador to the flight attendant. Here are a few of their trademark characteristics.

  • Opens the tray table upon arriving at their seat.
  • Also reclines their seat
  • Keeps their phone active after several attempts by the flight attendant to switch to airplane mode.
  • Uses noise-canceling headphones so they don’t hear the snack options and they have to be repeated
  • Goes to the bathroom once the plane starts to land or begins takeoff.
  • Reclines seat upon takeoff after flight attendant has sat down
  • Opens tray table and returns to text messaging.
  • Unbuckles seatbelt as soon as the plane’s wheels touch the runway.

It’s like they’ve never flown before. These are the type of people who will be asking how to inflate their life vest once they are swimming away from the fuselage.

Why We Avoid Eye Contact in Public (And Whether You Should Too)

~ SA Otey

Ever notice how people seem to look everywhere except at each other in public these days? You’re not imagining it—and there are some pretty understandable reasons behind this shift.

The New Social Norms

Smartphones have revolutionized how we navigate public spaces. They’ve become our social shield, giving us a socially acceptable way to appear busy and unavailable. Beyond the technology, our culture has shifted toward more individualistic behavior in public. Where previous generations might have exchanged nods with strangers, many people today prefer moving through public spaces without social obligations.

In crowded urban areas especially, avoiding eye contact serves as a psychological boundary that helps maintain personal space and privacy. For many, it also reduces social anxiety and the pressure to respond appropriately to stranger danger.

So Should You Follow Suit?

The answer depends on your comfort level and the situation. Brief, natural eye contact followed by a slight nod or smile can still be a positive interaction—it acknowledges others’ humanity without being intrusive. Many people actually appreciate this small gesture, particularly in smaller communities or less crowded settings. Deep soul stares not so much.

The key is reading the room. If someone is clearly focused on their phone, wearing headphones, or actively avoiding eye contact, respect their signals. Match the social energy around you while staying true to your own comfort level.

You don’t need to force interactions, but you also don’t need to completely shut down the possibility of brief, respectful human connection if it feels natural to you.

Trial Pack Portable Soft Contact Lens Insertion & Removal Tools – Silicone Rubber Eye Lens Inserter & Remover Device with Pincher End & Finger Grips – Safe & Easy to Use

How to order coffee at Starbucks

~ SA Otey
beans coffee drink cafe
Photo by Negative Space on Pexels.com

Does anyone drink coffee anymore? Whenever I sit at a Starbucks or similar coffee house and hear someone order a beverage it sounds way too complicated. It’s mostly milk/cream, and sugar with very little coffee added. It’s more like a coffee-flavored beverage. I get coffee, it’s easy, and all it needs to be added is a cup. But seriously, the only way to order coffee at Starbucks is to buy the beans and grind them at home to use them in your French Press. That is if you like over-roasted beans.

Recently it’s tough to walk in and order a coffee. You would think your best bet is using the app. However, the drive-thru gets the priority. I’ve ordered on the app, drove a few miles, and waited at the counter for 10 minutes for a venti black coffee with nothing added. The whole process was a half hour while the drive-thru recycled several times.

The Irritants Guide to 4th of July

~ SA Otey
  • Remind people that the birth of America is really July 2nd.
  • Buy fireworks 5 days in advance and buy enough to last until July 9th.
  • Begin your explosives demonstration on June 30th.
  • Drink lots of beer
  • Eat many forms of meat
  • Lose an appendage because you are too filled with meat to move away from the lit fireworks and too drunk to know that you are bleeding.
  • Put up a PTSD sign in your yard so that you can ruin the fun for your neighbors who bought a week’s supply of fireworks.
  • Also remind people that it wasn’t legit until Aug 2nd, thus extending your firework shooting period.

But seriously, if you have a problem with July 4th, just hole up in your house shut all the curtains and sit in a dark room watching movies with noise-canceling headphones like I do. Happy Holidays!

Fireworks are nice, but not after 11pm, most people are attempting to sleep after their ears have been damaged by decibels of destructive detonations. Fireworks are fantastic at first, but there’s always somebody who bought enough to obliterate a small island.

I understand the Fourth of July and New Year’s, but I think people love the excuse to play demolition expert and terrorize cul-de-sacs and side streets. Here are a few fireworks tips to help you maximize this special day.

  • Wait until it gets dark
  • Put them away at 11pm

Happy Independence Day!

Treating your kids like pets.

~ SA Otey

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As a follow-up to a previous post, there is another phenomenon going on in our society where kids are treated like animals. It hasn’t reached its apex quite yet. This says way more about the parents than it does the kids. These parents do not know how to handle their children and can’t set boundaries, so they create artificial ones.

You can make it look like a monkey on their back, but nothing is more demeaning than putting a child on a leash. What’s next, feeding your child from a bowl on the floor? Maybe take their diaper off and let them crap in the yard? Why not a shock collar and invisible fence so they don’t leave the yard?

How about putting them in a dog crate so they won’t destroy your house while you’re gone. Wow, I guess I forgot what I was talking about. Maybe take off the leash and let your kid make some mistakes. That’s how they learn.

What are pet parents?

~ SA Otey

petParents
First of all, pets are not children, they are animals. Yes, children are technically animals but they are a higher class and they eventually can clean up their own feces. Dogs can not pick up their own poop unless you consider eating feces cleaning up. Thankfully, my children have never eaten their own excrement, that I know of.

More and more I’m seeing dogs in strollers and in baby carriers at airports. People are using “service dogs” for all sorts of reasons. There are people who actually need service dogs and I understand that. But some people are severely allergic to dogs. If you are sitting near a dog, you are going to have a bad flight, especially if the dog takes a dump in the seat.

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Bumper stickers are taking shots at parents by saying that their dog is smarter than their honor student. Nonsense, let’s see your dog use a pencil and write their name or enter a spelling bee. Women proudly display “Dog Mom” on their cars, but we already have another name for that and it probably fits the bill.

Honestly, I wish raising kids was as easy as having a pet, but it’s not nearly as rewarding. Kids are awesome and not just because they don’t eat their own feces.