How to manage robocallers

Yeah, let me get that

Remember back in the days before Caller ID and *69 when you could call someone and say something offensive then hangup without any recompense? Well, now telemarketers have an arsenal of war dial devices at the ready.

My favorite is the lady who’s having trouble with her headset. The call starts with a “Hello, hello?” Then an apology that her headset isn’t working correctly and she asks for a confirmation that you can hear her. If you say yes then it’s a go ahead for her (the robot) to begin the sales pitch. The second time she called I said, “Didn’t you call me an hour ago?”. The robot replied, “I’m sorry, I didn’t get that, can you please say yes or no”. Once I knew it was a voice activated prompt, I began asking all sorts of questions that she couldn’t process. Finally I talked so much that it disconnected me. However, I still get calls from time to time.

Typically, if I don’t recognize the number, I will just silence my phone or double click the power button to send it voicemail. If the caller is not in my contacts and it’s an important message they will leave me a voicemail. However, these robots are now starting to leave voicemails. My call block list is growing exponentially.

How to keep your kids safe at the pool

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

While at the pool I had a great idea for a new smartphone app. It’s called iDrowned, the Anti-drowning smartphone app. The app works in tandem with a bracelet. Attach the bracelet to your toddler that doesn’t have swimmies on. The app will alert you when your child has fallen into the pool. As an upgrade, you can have an option bracelet on yourself that sends out an electric shock once your kid begins to drown. This allows you to keep looking at your smartphone as long as possible while ignoring your child.

How to selfie the right way.

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Please remember to look at the camera lens and not the image on your screen. It does make a difference. The selfies where your gaze is slightly askew is annoying. It’s even more irritating if you have a group shot and everyone is focused on themselves on the smartphone view screen. Think about it. You don’t go to Olan Mills and look off to the left or right (that’s for Glamour Shots only), you look at the lens!

Speakerphones in public

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There’s a hot new trend in smartphone usage. People have ditched traditional earbuds and Bluetooth earpieces to let everyone in on the conversation.

There are several ways talk on your speakerphone. You can hold it directly in front of your face like looking into a mirror. You can hold it like you are eating a pop tart and shout in the bottom of the phone. The most creative I’ve seen is tucking it into your shirt at the shoulder so the mic is near your mouth.

Remember to speak at a higher volume into the speakerphone, like it’s setting across the room.

How to shoot video on a smartphone

Putting your life events in digital format is the easiest way to capture your memories. You know, instead of actually watching the event with your own eyes, you watch a smaller version of the event as you “tape” it with your smartphone.

There are some people that are beyond help. Those people who watch a widescreen video in portrait mode on their iPad. It doesn’t even register when it’s played back on a widescreen tv that there are huge black bars on the side of the screen and the video in the middle. These are the same people that complained about the widescreen DVD’s.

Looks like this laptop will help those portrait videographers. I hope soon that the entertainment industry will start filming vertically so we can match our smartphones users video filming and viewing preferences. Maybe smartphone technology will advance to the point where it will always record in the widescreen aspect ratio.

How to setup your social media accounts.

We all have that friend who doesn’t know how to set up their social media accounts. Here’s a technical tip to allow yours to infinite loop post to all of your accounts.

  1. Twitter auto post to Facebook.
  2. Instagram auto post to Twitter
  3. Instagram to auto post to Facebook
  4. Facebook to auto post to twitter

This should cause all of your social media account to continually feed each other all the horrible content you produce and cause mass unfriending. Enjoy…

Should there be WiFi on School Buses?

 

Nice Pentagrams!

 

Some schools are now using your taxpayer dollars to put WiFi on the school bus. This is can have its pros and cons.

The Pros

The convenience of GPS Tracking of the bus to know where your kids are. You can get alerts via text message when the bus arrives so you don’t have to waste your time at the bus stop. Having WiFi could keep the kids quietly in their seats. Reduces the amount of face punching to other students and or bus drivers since the kids faces are in a device.

The Cons

Cyber bullying would skyrocket. Think of all the passive aggressive ways kids could be mean via social media to their fellow bus passengers. Why get up and punch someone in the face or body when you can emotionally destroy someone on the InstaFaceTwit?