Author: SA Otey

Software Engineer

Is Motherhood Harder Today Than in the Past?

~ SA Otey
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“Motherhood” is considered offensive in our fast-paced world of intolerance and sensitivity. Is it more difficult to be a Mom in this society than a few decades ago?

Well, no, a few decades ago, you had small children, now you have adults who are your children, and you can do what you want. But if you are a mother today with small children, it’s tough because small children are hard to manage sometimes. However, if your small children are large, then they’re strenuous to lift unless you are one of the weightlifter moms who gets your kids fat on purpose so you can build your muscles. That’s wrong. Maybe you should just stick to weights and put your baby on a healthy eating plan. If you want to, I’m not telling you how to mom your kids.

The Benefits of Reserved Theater Seating

~ SA Otey
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Don’t reserve the seats outside the theater

Why does something get compared to sliced bread whenever it’s considered the best new thing? With a good knife, bread is easy to slice.  However, if I had to pick something as the best thing since sliced bread then I’m going to go with reserved theater seating. I’m so glad that my local theater has deployed this method of sitting.  Using your smartphone to pick the seat you want as soon as tickets go on sale is super convenient. It allows for dinner time beforehand without the pressure of waiting in a line that snakes out the door. It also allows you to skip the 20 minutes of previews that you’ve already seen on Youtube. During that time people have polished off their trough of popcorn so you can skip the part where it sounds like everyone around you is eating wicker furniture.

So what happens when you get to your seat and someone is perched there? It hasn’t happened yet, but in our age of entitlement and equality, it’s only a matter of time before someone complains that it’s not fair that you got the best seat in the house. You know,  because you planned ahead.

Struggles with Biscuit Bags: Tips for Easy Opening

~ SA Otey

I don’t know if there is some insider secret but my success rate with opening biscuit bags is about 1%. It’s simple, right? Tear here and then pull apart the zip lock seal. Almost never happens to me. I tear, I rip, and I split. You might ask, why am I eating frozen biscuits and not farm-to-table ones? I eat frozen biscuits because I don’t eat them very often and they are easy. I can’t tell the difference between a fresh and a frozen biscuit and I don’t live near a Tudors so it’s not that big of a deal to me. I just hope they invent some better biscuit bag technology. Maybe I’m just too impatient when opening the bag?

How much would you pay for a soda?

~ SA Otey
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ATL airport in 2011, worse than Disney’s prices

Or how much would you pay for water? Airports have you right where they want you. You can beat the game by packing your water bottle and a few protein bars when hunger and thirst arrive before your already delayed flight.

That is, of course, unless you enjoy spending $100 on Doritos and a Coke Zero. I suggest you bring your empty Camelbak through TSA and then fill it with a sink, fountain, or filtered water. Even when I’m on a client’s per diem, I will not submit to this price gouging.  Remember, it’s not long until you get on board your plane and get an ice-filled cup with a quarter can of soda.

No light on at the checkout line…

~ SA Otey
Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels.com

When I notice a cashier ringing up customers and see the register number light is off I don’t get in their line. If they have a closed placard on the conveyor belt this is a sure signal that they are closing down. However, there are people who will put their groceries on the belt anyway. Even go as far as to move the placard. The cashier will say they are closing down the line but the people don’t budge. This is the equivalent of going into a steak restaurant and ordering a well-done rib eye five minutes before closing. It’s rude to enter a place of business so late. Also, who cooks their steak well? Savages that’s who.

Essential Tips for Buying and Selling on eBay

~ SA Otey
Click picture to buy this tape gun!

Buying

  • Know the time your item ends and have a prompt payment.
  • Inspect the item and give prompt feedback.
  • Don’t blame the eBayer if the delivery is lost.

Selling

  • Don’t over price your item (aim to get it sold)
  • Offer free shipping, but include the price of shipping in your buy it now.
  • Ship the item within a day.
  • Don’t be so quick to leave feedback, wait until they give you positive feedback.
  • If they are unfair in their feedback, respond reciprocally.

It’s that simple.

Check out my items for sale => https://www.ebay.com/usr/odiwan

Get some bulk mailing supplies

Save some time and print your labels

Best shower heads for your home

~ SA Otey

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I used to love the shower heads at Holiday Inn Express, but since their beds are so uncomfortable I had to switch to Hilton hotels. I believe that Hilton uses Waterpik or Speakman, both are nice, but can’t compete with Kohler. I just wish I could find an excellent metal Kohler showerhead to purchase for home use. I bought a Kohler model once, but it had a plastic mount and the mount broke after a year. The replacement part was almost as much as a showerhead. So I just buy new shower heads every few years now. 

I know you can clean them with a zip lock bag and whatever miracle liquid cleaner is on the market, but there is still crud behind the nozzles deeper than the cleaner fluids can reach. Side note, don’t you find it disturbing when there is other hair on a hotel shower wall? You haven’t showered yet, so it’s not yours, and it will never wash down the drain no matter how much water you throw at it.

Bring sleek, space-saving style to your shower with Prone, an innovative 3-in-1 1.75 gpm combo shower kit. The handshower features three unique spray experiences to lavish you plus PowerSweep, a concentrated spray of water that can be used to clean soap scum from your shower walls and grout, remove caked-on mud and grime from clothing and shoes, or rinse shampoo from your furry friends. A magnetic docking system locks the handshower securely in place when not in use. The single-function showerhead can tilt to act as a rainhead so your shower will never be boring again.

Don’t describe your meal in this way.

~ SA Otey

According to Wikipedia, and probably some doctors too. A perforated ulcer is a condition in which an untreated ulcer can burn through the wall of the stomach (or other areas of the gastrointestinal tract), allowing digestive juices and food to leak into the abdominal cavity. Treatment generally requires immediate surgery.

So, why does someone describe a delicious hearty meal as “stick to your ribs”? If food is sticking to your ribs you probably have a perforated ulcer and require medical attention.

I recommend Traegers…

https://amzn.to/3JOnJzo

Unlock the Secret to Movie Theater Popcorn

~ SA Otey
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I didn’t see this option on the menu.

Why is movie popcorn so delicious, yet we can never replicate it at home? I’ve gotten pretty close, and here’s my super, not-so-secret recipe.

Start with really good popcorn

I recommend Orville Redenbacher because of the quality control and consistency. Don’t buy store brands because they are all terrible. I may be wrong, but I don’t care. Store in an airtight container in the dark pantry. Use 1/2 cup per pop session.

Use Coconut oil

Pop your kernels in coconut oil, that’s what the theaters use. It has a high smoke point so it can get really hot and explode the kernels much better. Plus it tastes better. Use about 3 tablespoons

Use fine ground salt

Popcorn salt is different, it’s finely ground so that it sticks to all the popcorn’s intricate crevasses.

Top it off with fake butter

Real butter is good, but if you want to get close to the movie theater taste, lube up your bowl with this Buttery flavor Popcorn Topping. It may be unnatural, but we aren’t going for healthful when eating movie theater popcorn. We are going for taste, and this one is pretty close.  Try substituting 1 tablespoon of coconut oil with this butter oil.

A Proper Popper

There are several ways to popcorn, but my favorite is the Whirley-Pop. It’s fast and easy to clean up

Best cat litter for your feline overlord 

~ SA Otey


I’m not impressed by many products but this Slide litter by Arm & Hammer is pretty great. This litter almost has a play dough-like consistency once it reacts to the cat pee. It’s reminiscent of litter critters. There is nothing worse than scraping off dried diarrhea from the bottom of the litter pan because your cat is stressed out. While this is not the best-smelling cat litter on the market, it smells better than most. It does well at covering up the odor of cat urine and feces. If you combine this with a litter genie your guests won’t even know you have a cat. That is unless they are deathly allergic and can’t breathe upon entering your home.