I’m not sure about you, but I prefer “scoop” scooped ice cream. Not a fan of someone sticking their hands into the ice cream containers and placing a glob on the top of my cone. This applies equally to hand-spun milkshakes. Why would anyone want someone to stick their dirty digit into a cup of ice cream and milk and shake it? No thanks.
I’m guessing it’s dipped out with a scoop and not “dip” flavored. Wintergreen would be OK as long as it’s laced with Nicotine. Mouth tobacco is something I’ve never understood or cared for. I did try it once when my Dad brought home a case of it that was damaged in shipment. I’ll set the scene for you.
That night, my mother prepared Tuna Helper for dinner, and I had two hot, heaping helpings. I grabbed a hockey puck-sized can of whatever brand of black tar it was and stepped outside to enjoy a pinch. Well, I wish I knew a pinch was all you needed. I proceeded to load up both cheeks full of tobacco mouth mulch. It wasn’t long before I started to feel cold and tingly, and the trees around me started to spin and bend in half before my eyes. My parents thought they saw a ghost as a bright white streak ran past them and into the family toilet room. I unloaded the majority of the aforementioned tuna helper directly into the bowl with a single motion. Once I got a whiff of half-digested tuna and noodles coated in black soot, the remaining chicken of the sea found its way into the sewer entrance to swim its way back home.
To this day, the smell of “dip” reminds me of that night. However, I really liked Tuna Helper, but I can’t even look at the box now.
When did pumpkin spice get all over and inside of everything? I don’t remember it being associated with Fall as much as it is now. The Pumpkin Spice things have started rolling out in August there at least needs to be a moratorium until the first day of fall. You have to admit it’s gotten out of control.
By the way, pumpkin spice is CINNAMON, GINGER, NUTMEG, ALLSPICE, AND SULFITING AGENTS. There is no pumpkin in there at all.
What does “Old School” even mean? I guess it’s the same as “Classic” or old for that matter. It conjures up images of senior citizens eating corn on the cob with their dentures. Apparently, corn on the cob and apples are the standard for all elderly dental work adhesives. Old school also renders mental images of break-dancers with bandanas and fat shoelaces booming their boxes with fun party hip-hop music before the curse word-laden rhymes took the spotlight.
When does it become “Old School”? Just because a restaurant comes up with a new recipe for a cheeseburger doesn’t automatically render all other cheeseburgers as “Old School”. The same goes for hot dogs and pizza. You’ve only come up with a new recipe, you didn’t change the paradigm for the food industry going forward. Wow yeah, you put a fried egg on all foods and now it’s new school?
“New school” is supposed to be cutting edge and fresh, something never done before. Everything has been done before, people just forget and steal other ideas and make it their own.
The slow-carb diet is/was the best diet for me. I’ve been on and off diet/lifestyle since January 2016. According to my doctor, my weight peaked at about 292 lbs. Right before Thanksgiving 2016, I weighed in at 233 lbs, and during that year, and did not do one bit of exercise. You can read about the diet on the Tim Ferris website or buy his book The Four Hour Body. I did both.
What I love most about the diet is how well you feel during the week, your mind is sharp and you have an overall feeling of wellness. What I used to love but not so much anymore is the cheat day. You can eat whatever you want, quite literally. I think my progress has slowed down because I don’t do a proper cheat day anymore and I don’t eat enough during the week. I don’t like the cheat day because I feel miserable the day of and the day after. Here is what a proper cheat day looks like
I’ve started to walk every morning and do more weightlifting because I’m getting older and starting to feel weak. I’m sure in a few years people will figure out that intermittent fasting/keto is not good for you and and is actually killing you faster, that’s just my guess.
Honestly, I’m just grateful that I can fill up a cart without feeling like I need to take out a loan. Aldi keeps me guessing with their mystery aisle treasures, Walmart always comes through in a pinch, and the warehouse store makes me feel like I’m stocking up for the apocalypse. It may not be Instagram-worthy like a Trader Joe’s haul, but I walk out with food that tastes good, fills me up, and doesn’t leave my wallet in tears. At the end of the day, laughter, full bellies, and a stocked pantry beat fancy labels any time.
I don’t live in a nice enough part of town to shop at Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s. I have slum it and make do with what I have available. I typically only shop at three stores. Aldi, Walmart, and some sort of big box warehouse store. Don’t get me wrong, I like the idea of Whole Foods, but don’t feel it warrants the price for the food. The human bodies digestion system is pretty amazing and I don’t think it matters how much the food costs. Organic doesn’t mean that much to me and if it only takes a few extra years away from my life, I’m OK with that.
I’ve never been a huge fan of cereal because of all the sugar and milk. Here are a few of my favorites and why.
No, it’s not the roles they take or their political or religious opinions. It may surprise you that it’s a very simple mistake that could easily be fixed. I’m no actor so my advice may not be well regarded so here goes.
One of my biggest pet peeves is how actors drink coffee on screen.
When someone hands you a fresh cup and you can tell it’s empty, don’t immediately tilt it 45 degrees. Coffee is typically hot and unless your throat is made of cast iron, take a small sip from the rim of the cup. You also need to make an attempt to swallow. No one takes a sip of coffee and holds it in their mouth until it absorbs.
No one waves their cup of coffee around without it spilling everywhere. Keep your hand motions to a minimum like there is boiling lava in your drinking vessel. Maybe put water in the cup? There needs to be weight in your hand.
Keep the cup silent, we can hear the knock of an empty cup in our living rooms from our loudspeakers. This is also where a ceramic mug would come in handy. It’s a simple mistake that can be easily fixed.
Someone once told me, “If it’s good enough for MJ, then it’s good enough for me.” I’m not a massive fan of Citrus Cooler, but it’s drinkable. I’m classic lemon-lime or nothing. The new bolder smoother finish Gatorade taste like cough syrup. I guess if you like pretending you have bronchitis then it’s a good drink.
Whenever I spend much time outside on the ball field, I now reach for a LMNT. I was feeling quite ill from lack of hydration and LMNT had me feeling correct in about 20 mins. I never realized until now but it’s like drinking salt water. Might as well start drinking soy sauce, probably will hydrate quicker right?
I regret not eating it. I saw it too late after I ordered. I talked to the manager at the Hapeville Dwarf House and he said they served 125 to Georgia Tech students the night before. They have a tradition for first-year band members where they have to eat it without utensils. One girl finished it in 50 seconds. She’s my new hero.
I will attempt to make this at home. Chicken, cream of chicken, bacon, cheese, and paprika. It should be a cinch.
Daily Irritant 
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