Do you let your 8 year old smoke?

8yearoldSmoker

Just thought it was odd when I was renewing my policy during open enrollment for Blue Cross Blue Shield. Can’t believe it’s an option, but I’m sure if you clicked next on the signup wizard you would be denied coverage and reported to DSS. At least, that’s what should happen.

A side note, I got a letter from South Carolina Blues saying that there are cheaper options than I currently have. There was also a slam about our “current administration” in there too. But the shocking thing is I compared the two plans and one of them was $300 cheaper for the EXACT same coverage. Let that be a warning to you. Go check out your open enrollment options, don’t let your same policy roll over. You could be paying more than you should.

Top ten travel ball clichés

  1. Every single dugout cheer ever, all teams do the same ones, not every team is “unstoppable”
  2. The parent who is cursing at the coach for their kids’ playing time
  3. The stat keeper who is advising the coach on what player should be in the lineup
  4. The bleacher coach is overriding the coach’s play.
  5. The grandparents are cheering for their player for sitting on the bench the whole game.
  6. The e-cigarette guy who is blowing vapors in the stands, because he says it’s not a real cigarette.
  7. The concession stand junkie who is constantly chowing down on greasy treats
  8. The Travel Ball Pro has tents, yeti coolers, and fans powered by generators.
  9. The kid who is an emotional wreck after every minor error or who cries after they go deep and they catch the fly ball.
  10. The football fan is watching the game rather than his child.

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Homeschooling Q&A FAQs

#1. Do you test your homeschooled kids?

The question will inevitably arise when someone discovers you homeschool. “What about testing?

What about it? Why test? Who are we comparing to? What standard of measure do you use? Do you want me to test my children to see how they compare to public school kids? If that’s the case, I would send them to public school. The simple answer is, “We teach through mastery.” We don’t teach to take a test.

#2. What about socialization?

You mean being able to talk to other people whenever you want instead of:

  • Standing/Walking in single file down hallways
  • Sitting at a desk for 6 hours and not being able to:
    • Pass Notes
    • Talk without raising your hand
    • Go to the toilet when you want
  • Perhaps if they are good and don’t misbehave, they will receive a 15-30 minute break to socialize outside under strict supervision.

Homeschool kids get plenty of socialization, such as Little League, co-ops, and nature

#3. How do you have the patience to homeschool your kids?

When people ask or say, “I just don’t have the patience to homeschool my kids”. Let me tell you a little secret, we don’t either. But life’s all about overcoming our deficiencies right?  Now think about how much patience it takes for one teacher with a classroom of forty kids just like yours.

4#. When is your last day of school?

The short answer is when they leave for college. Schooling all year round is important for the whole mastery thing. Giving breaks is important too, like going to Theme Parks when everyone else is in school and we have the run of the place.

Why Dogs Can’t Replace Grandchildren

This couple is taking it pretty well that their offspring aren’t providing any grandchildren. As much as our society is trying, dogs will never replace children in value. It makes me sad to even write that, but I feel that our society wants this to happen. Even the movie “The Boss Baby” addresses the issue. Who’s going to be there for you when you get revert back to your second toddler phase and need care? Dogs can’t provide that.

Teaching Kids Value: A Mall Experience

I really used to love going to malls. One of my favorite memories as a kid was scraping up enough money during the week to purchase a new hip-hop cassette tape and a paper cup of thick-cut fries from the Steak Escape. We took our children to the Opry Mills Mall in Nashville on vacation so they could see its grandness. I turned my back for one minute and it happened. My daughter was held hostage by a shiny object at a kiosk.

The young lady was selling “splat toys”. You fling it at the wall and it flattens out in a hilarious fashion. My daughter was intrigued and proceeded to practice her softball pitching motion and hit the bullseye. She thought the price wasn’t a good deal, walked away, but then accepted the lady’s counteroffer. She spent her hard-earned allowance money and this is where the story becomes a life lesson.

When she got a chance to use the new toy it burst open after about a dozen tosses. She was quite upset that her money was now gone and she had no way to return it. No, I didn’t rush out and buy her a new one. I didn’t offer to reimburse her for the allowance. I did teach her what the phrase “Caveat Emptor” means.

Trapper Keepers and Sneakers: School Year Essentials

pumas

There you are enjoying your summer of sunburns, splinters, spider bites and then the back to school circular shows up. The radio DJ won’t keep his trap shut about going back to school. Your parents were so happy to show it to you just to let you know the end of summer fun is nigh.

The best part of back to school was getting a brand new trapper keeper to put your doodles in because the teacher was uninteresting. The worst part was showing up with your new clothes and sneakers only to be mocked for having last year’s models of Swede Pumas. How did seventh graders know this? I was happy to have name brands!

Redefining Fatherhood: Dads Are Not Babysitters

Image 2018-07-25_09-23-40-802
Thumbs down for your parenting

When I was a new dad many years ago and my wife went out with her friends for an evening without endless crying, feedings, and more poop than she cared to look at. It was also helpful to have an evening away from the newborn as well.  Someone would inevitably chime in with, “Ah, doing a little babysitting eh?”. Well, no, this is my child, do you not remember? They are my responsibility too. Believe it or not, men know how to take care of the children.

Here is my best advice for new dads out there when you are watching the newborn.

  • Feed the baby
  • Re-diaper the baby
  • Swaddle the baby
  • Talk to the baby like a normal person
  • Let baby sleep

If you’ve done all these things and the baby is crying, won’t go to sleep, and there is no immediate danger, then you did your job as a Dad. When your wife gets home, you can tell her everything was perfect.

Navigating Booster Seat Safety: What You Need to Know

When do you let your kids out of a booster seat? Whenever I want to, that’s when. I understand safety guidelines, but how is a booster seat going to help at the rate of speed that I drive? Or as a matter of fact, someone else is driving? A crash at that speed the child might as well be sitting on a stack of glued-together phone books.

I remember lying in the front seat of my Dad’s Dodge Dart when we had a wreck, and I believe I hit the windshield. But that part is fuzzy. I turned out fine. If a child can put their feet on the floor with their back to the seat and the seatbelt doesn’t choke them, then they are ready to toss the booster seat. Not out the window because I do not believe in littering.

I recall taking a nap in the front seat of my Dad’s Dodge Dart when my father had a wreck, and I believe I hit the windshield. But that part is unclear. I turned out just fine.

*Disclaimer, don’t break the law, check your local guidelines and follow them. Or at least, don’t get caught or wreck. Oh, who cares you are going to do what you want anyway.

Do you share music with your children?

skc cassette tape on white surface

I’ll never forget the look of shock on my Dad’s face when he was taking me to school and was curious to what the younger kids were listening to. I don’t know if he asked or I just inserted the cassette tape. Anyway, I played a few short snippets of the latest 2 Live Crew release. It wasn’t long before the tape was ejected and then very few words were spoken on the remainder of the journey to school. The cloud of disappointment was precipitous.

I’ve pretty much abandoned all Hip-Hop after 1997 because I really started listening to the lyrics and how terrible the content was. Turns out, I really only liked the beats and scratching. I’ve since started a small project where I will find the instrumentals and splice together the hooks and scratches so I don’t have to hear all the vulgarities.

Now that I’m an adult, I’ve become concerned with what my children listen to. They don’t listen to much other than Disney soundtracks or whatever I listen to when I take them places. Don’t worry, NWA and 2 Live Crew don’t make it into the rotation anymore. The closest I get to listening to Luke Skywalker is the Star Wars scores.

https://embed.music.apple.com/us/playlist/favorite-songs/pl.u-DpUKX47x

Front Seat Safety: Age and Weight Restrictions Explained

When do you let your kids ride in the front seat? Well, hopefully never. Maybe when they are old enough to drive. Once they make that move from the back to front, they will try to control the A/C and SiriusXM settings. We have a 100-pound rule in our state; once they reach that weight threshold, they can sit in the front seat. We figure by then they will be tall enough as well. So we have to control their diet so we don’t end up with a 100-pound 3-foot weeble wobble in the front seat. There are some stipulations.