Category: Politics

If Disney Ran the United States

~ SA Otey
IMG_7200
Mr. Walt and his running mate for 2024

Can you imagineer the possibilities if Disney ran the country? There would be pros and cons of course. I guess it really depends on if you are a fan of Disney.

Healthcare

Healthcare costs would skyrocket, but you could at least reserve a Lightning Lane for the emergency room. How awesome would it be to immediately hop on a paper-covered table to be examined while others have been waiting for 90 minutes for a 3-minute diagnosis? All your medicine would cost four times as much. However,  you can pay a premium if you want to guzzle your Robitussin from a souvenir cup.

Immigration

It would be too expensive to enter the United States, and you would have so many people complaining, “I wish I could afford to go to the United States”. Maybe there would be blackout dates when you couldn’t stay in the country. The truth is, every Main Street USA would be packed to capacity, but at least it would smell good with Disney bakery exhaust.

Taxes

There would be no taxes whatsoever because there would be limited choices of high-quality items that are out of everyone’s price range.

Disney National Parks Service

Since the entire country would essentially be Disney Country, Walt Disney World, and Disneyland would essentially just be like any other national park. All the other National Parks would get an upgrade as well. Can you imagine a giant slide into the Grand Canyon or the Haunted Mammoth Cave?

Transportation and Infrastructure

If you’ve ridden Spaceship Earth at Epcot, you would see this future vision of automation fast-tracked. People movers would drop you off at work after you’ve been dressed by a Carousel of Progress robot. We would have automobile safety on par with Tomorrowland Speedway because all our cars would be on rails so we couldn’t knock each other into the ditch. However, all of America’s roadways would be exactly like Orlando traffic to encourage you to take those People movers.

Does Climate Change Make Hurricanes Stronger?

~ SA Otey
hurricanes

Asking for a friend…

We’ve known about climate change, (formally known as Global Warming, formally known as Next Ice Age) for decades. For as long as I can remember I haven’t purposely burnt large piles of Styrofoam containers in my yard to do my part in combating climate change. So with all the forced regulations in car companies making our cars lighter and more fuel efficient (and less safe), why are we still having a climate change problem? We’ve thrown tons of money at the problem and created huge solar farms covering up plenty of oxygen-producing grass. We’ve built huge eyesore wind farms and killed tons of birds. We’ve cut back on fossil fuels. Shouldn’t it be getting better and not worse? What are we supposed to do?

The Power of Kindness Amid Political Polarization

~ SA Otey


I’ve been voting for several elections now and I don’t recall so much hostility towards any president as much as Donald Trump. I’ve never seen so many commercialized insults towards President Trump and now it seems that candy companies are throwing their hat in the ring. Just because you have freedom of speech doesn’t give you the freedom to be disrespectful towards your fellow humans. Well, I guess it does.

But let’s remember that even if someone is “your enemy” then treating them with kindness is like dumping burning coals on them. Got that from some book, not sure which one. I think it’s the same one as the golden rule or something.

How does the average person fix climate change?

~ SA Otey

What are we supposed to do now that the majority of the developed world now has access to clean water and clean air because of fossil fuels? Fossil fuels are cheap, plentiful and because of technology, we’ve made them cleaner than ever. Still, people are freaking out about climate change aka “Global Warming”. Here’s what to do.

Stop using your AC/Heat

Want to stop using fossil fuels? Then don’t heat or cool your house. Each year the planet gets hotter because people are using air conditioning or heating their house because they get cold.

Stop showering

Your sweat will be your shower from not using your HVAC system. Since we have greater access to clean and drinkable water because of fossil fuels, we should now use less.

Stop flushing your toilet

Let it flush automatically buy the natural volume of your excrement. Again forget clean water, treat your house like a porta potty.

Don’t buy groceries

No groceries equals no trash and no landfills, grow all your own food, but only vegetables.

Ride your bike everywhere

Including your trek across America with your family of four. Remember having more than two children effects climate change.

It seems to me that Hollywood wants to turn all of their viewers into a third world country because of climate change. Remember, movies became popular because they were the first to get air conditioning. Maybe if we stop cooling our theaters then our celebrity elite will wake up.

There are no men’s restrooms anymore.

~ SA Otey
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Do you go #1 or #2 in this thing?

On our way back from a long trip, we stopped at a gas station to use the toilets. I noticed a line of ladies had formed outside the bathrooms. As I approached the men’s room, a woman walked out and another one entered without hesitation.

Me: “Are we having some gender confusion here, ladies?”

Random Lady: “Women have babies, so we get to use your bathrooms”

I didn’t understand her logic, so I fired back…

Men get kicked in the testicles, so we can use your bathrooms?

Another time I went to a store and had to use the toilet. Surprisingly, there was only a “Family” and a woman’s restroom. My family wasn’t with me, so I had to use the women’s restroom, no other choice.
It’s not the first time I’ve used a woman’s toilet. I was interviewing for a job and was exhausted from the long flight and the uncomfortable hotel bed. After my lunch with the recruiter, I met my sister at Sam’s club to buy some snacks. I stopped off at the bathroom first and wondered why there were no urinals. I picked a stall next to someone who was sitting. I stood up to pee as normal. As I walked out, I did a doubletake as I saw the “Men’s” sign as I exited the women’s restroom. My sister was doubled over in laughter, but I’m sure the lady who was still in the toilet was just as confused as I was.
Now that we are moving to Gender Neutral restrooms in public places, this gives a whole new meaning to the term, “Baby Changing Stations”. I hope people don’t do anything stupid.

How to argue on social media.

~ SA Otey
photography of brickwall
Photo by Fancycrave on Pexels.com

Do you know someone who is always on the opposite side of your opinion? I’m not talking about your spouse, it’s supposed to be that way. But someone who always starts their response with “Well, actually…”

Star Wars vs Star Trek, DC vs Marvel, Republican vs Democrat vs some weirdo 3rd party, Christian vs Pagan (Don’t even get me started on the Religious subcultures, that’s an issue that loses more friendships than any)

Some people like to hear your opinion first to play “devil’s advocate” and get on your nerves. It’s tough to be friends with people like this. How do you deal with it? Well, you can always ask a bunch of follow-up questions if they are the type of person who makes statements. The best way is just to keep quiet and not share your opinions. Someone can’t shoot you down if you don’t give them any ammo. Read Twitter posts, and Facebook status, and just grin and move on. But you can’t right? So if you must be right all the time, unleash your best with no mercy and enjoy no friendships. Remember the Devil’s advocate is just another demon.

What do Democrats and Republicans Believe? Part II: Economy

~ SA Otey

get it @ redbubble.com

Democrats:

Favor policies that promote economic equality, such as progressive taxation, increasing the minimum wage to drive the cost of goods and services up and customer service down to nonexistent. Expanding social welfare programs like abortion healthcare and brainwashing education.

Republicans:

Advocate for lower taxes so you are not working more and getting paid less. Deregulation to stimulate economic growth, and free-market principles with minimal government intervention.

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What do Democrats and Republicans Believe? Part I: Ideological Spectrum

~ SA Otey

https://www.teepublic.com/sticker/51556654-fedup-with-politics-in-2024

Democrats:

Also called the “left” of the political spectrum. Emphasize social welfare programs at the expense of the taxpayer turning the safety net into a hammock. Environmental protection except for their private Gulfstream jets to attend climate change summits. Healthcare reform so your benefits are decreased to fund their premium plans. Progressive taxation, taking more of your money to fund government programs.

Republicans:

Positioned on the “right” of the spectrum. Advocate for limited government so you can mind your own business with little intervention in the economy. Lower taxes so you can keep more of what you earn so you can donate generously and not against your will to entities you disagree with. More deregulation so you can drive the car you enjoy without worrying about destroying countries mining for battery parts. Traditional values so you can keep our society from getting out of control with pagan ideologies.

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Hating on Winnie the Pooh.

~ SA Otey
Old pooh

I’ve had this one almost as long as I’ve been alive. I got him for my first birthday. He still hasn’t disintegrated thus far. Not sure how anyone can ban Pooh from anything. He’s such a nice bear that we overlook the gorging on the honey. I mean, he even has a ride at Walt Disney’s Magic Kingdom. There isn’t any higher honor than that.