This couple is taking it pretty well that their offspring aren’t providing any grandchildren. As much as our society is trying, dogs will never replace children in value. It makes me sad to even write that, but I feel that our society wants this to happen. Even the movie “The Boss Baby” addresses the issue. Who’s going to be there for you when you get revert back to your second toddler phase and need care? Dogs can’t provide that.
People bring their dogs everywhere. Restaurants, libraries, grocery stores, the doctor, no not the vet. Tourist attractions are now putting up passive-aggressive signs to subtly hint that no one likes your dog. There used to be a time when you’d see a stroller with a cute baby, but now it’s occupied by a dog. People will carry their dogs in a Baby Bjorn just so they don’t have to pay for a kennel.
I’m not talking about a table scrap thrown to the floor for them to enjoy and get diarrhea later. I’m speaking of something I’m seeing more often in public. People give dogs their ice cream cones and share a table at a restaurant. Yes, there are dining establishments that now have portions of their menu dedicated to dogs. Drive-thru banks have dog treats in addition to lollipops for your children.
What I saw today disturbed me. A grown man with a shaved ice treats sitting on a bench at an outlet mall sharing it with a standard poodle. One cup and two spoons. There is a myth that a dog’s mouth is clean. But in reality, it’s only clean for them, since their saliva may or may not contain antiseptic and antibacterial properties. They can still reach their testicles and butt hole and they may have just finished off a serving of gnat butter before you dipped their spoon into your dessert.
First of all, pets are not children, they are animals. Yes, children are technically animals but they are a higher class and they eventually can clean up their own feces. Dogs can not pick up their own poop unless you consider eating feces cleaning up. Thankfully, my children have never eaten their own excrement, that I know of.
More and more I’m seeing dogs in strollers and in baby carriers at airports. People are using “service dogs” for all sorts of reasons. There are people who actually need service dogs and I understand that. But some people are severely allergic to dogs. If you are sitting near a dog, you are going to have a bad flight, especially if the dog takes a dump in the seat.
Bumper stickers are taking shots at parents by saying that their dog is smarter than their honor student. Nonsense, let’s see your dog use a pencil and write their name or enter a spelling bee. Women proudly display “Dog Mom” on their cars, but we already have another name for that and it probably fits the bill.
Honestly, I wish raising kids was as easy as having a pet, but it’s not nearly as rewarding. Kids are awesome and not just because they don’t eat their own feces.
Daily Irritant 
You must be logged in to post a comment.